Checked Out
by OublietteVII
Summary: Naruto has found the girl of his dreams. And after weeks of planning, he's ready to make his move. But sometimes, appearances can be deceiving-and at others, they're all you need. Expect the unexpected. Oneshot, AU.


**Checked Out**

**DISCLAIMER: **I do not own 'Naruto. All rights belong to Masashi Kishimoto. I only own this story. Thank you.

"There she is! Same table, as usual…"

Blond spiky hair stood up over the top of a clean, green, plastic potted palm. Bright blue eyes stared ahead intently through the thin leaves, as their orange-clad owner slowly shuffled to the right, out from hiding.

'BUMP' "Whoa!" Unfortunately, that intense concentration should have been applied to the ground, instead of across the Galleria food court. A white sneakered foot stepped forward, into an unseen crack between the linoleum tiles, and the figure nearly went flying. Flailing his arms wildly, he managed to dart behind a nearby corner.

"Jeez…" Nineteen year old Uzumaki Naruto wiped his brow clean of any unsightly sweat drops. His heart pounded furiously in his chest, as he carefully peered out from his makeshift hideaway. Hopefully, nobody had seen him stumble.

"I can't afford any mistakes today, dattebayo!" He took a few deep breaths, running a tanned hand through his thick golden locks. Maybe they'd finally flatten out for once?

'SPROING' "Aww…" No such luck. As usual, they reverted back to their familiar stance: pointed and prominent above his head. Like a massive, messy crown. "Oh, well." He pushed the thought of smooth hair from his mind, refocusing his attention on the lone figure seated at the table for two. The scene was framed by the large silver and glass elevator to the left, and a small fountain to the right.

She was about his age. Pale, creamy skin tone, stunning mint green eyes, slender limbs, and a narrow waist-a perfectly fit physique. Her heart-shaped face was tilted downwards-she was obviously focused upon a thick, open book. Sweet, sugary pink locks fell forward, grazing her neck and cheeks, while framing her face in soft wisps.

Just watching her was enough to send Naruto's heart racing once more. He smiled in half-dreamy, half-dopey admiration, as she reached over her reading material to pick up a nearby beverage. Her petal shaped lips parted, and she took a long sip from the straw. Her eyes were partially closed, adding an extra touch of delicate grace. Just like a goddess.

He had first met her exactly two weeks ago. Well, not really met-he hadn't actually talked to her yet. That was just the first time he'd seen her. On a lunch break from his job at a local ramen shop, he'd decided to stop in at the Galleria for a change of pace. And surprise, surprise-there she was.

So now, after those two agonizingly long weeks of interrupted daydreams, sleepless nights, and hiding like a coward behind various manner of potted flora, it had all come down to this. Today was the day. No more running. He would finally be a man-and win the woman of his dreams!

Or at least just talk to her. And he knew exactly how to pull it off, too.

In his days of frenzied observation, Naruto had noticed one important fact. The pinkette carried a small red purse, which she would always place precariously close on the edge of the tabletop. And, almost like clockwork, at some point or another, it would always end up falling off. It was weighed down on one end with various keychains. He'd watch her furrow her prominent-but smooth-brow, tutting as she picked it up.

Leaning out more so from his vantage point, the blond bit his lower lip in anticipation. Glancing at her right arm, to check the time on a watch, she closed her book and prepared to rise from her seat.

'CLATTER' "Oh, darn it! Not again!" This was it! His one and only chance!

'WHOOSH' In a burst of what could only be described as superhuman speed, Naruto managed to skid to a stop before the startled girl, snatching the purse from the ground-and her outstretched fingers.

"I…I believe… 'huff' that you…that you dropped this, miss… 'huff'…" His arm was trembling, as he handed the bag to her.

Inside, he was screaming. He should have gotten closer from the beginning! Now, not only was he sweaty and out of breath, but she probably thought he was a freak! Tentatively, he looked up at her, one baby blue eye open.

Her green eyes were wide and her eyebrows were raised, but other than a couple of slow blinks, she didn't seem too fazed. Instantly, Naruto's hope was restored.

"Uh, thank you…" As she reached forward to take the purse from his warm grip, her fingertips lightly brushed his wrist. He was in heaven!

She broke into a small smile. "Gee…that's the first time anyone's helped me with my things here…and so fast, too." She tilted her head. It was certainly a sight to remember. "Are you…okay?"

At this, he straightened up, mentally pleading that his hair wasn't too wild, or that his face wasn't so red that it looked swollen. He did his best to attempt an attractive grin, as he locked eyes with her fully, blue on green. "I'm great! In fact, I'm A-OK, dattebayo!"

Whoops. _Too_ eager.

She leaned back a little. "Alright…well, I'm glad to hear that." She slipped her purse over her shoulder, and made a motion for her reading material. Up close, it appeared to be some sort of textbook.

"Wait!" His cry startled her. Desperate, he cleared his throat. "I mean, uh…hi, I'm Uzumaki Naruto!" He stuck out his left hand.

**_Stupid, stupid, stupid!_ **His mind was in meltdown mode! She probably thought that he was a stalker-or worse, a total flake!

The silence was deafening. Not even the mall chatter could divert attention. Naruto waited for the seemingly inevitable tell-off.

But to his surprise, a tender, cool hand slipped into his own. She was shaking his hand…_she_ was _shaking_ _his_ _hand!_ "Well, it's…nice to meet you, Naruto." She was smiling, too! "I'm Haruno Sakura."

**_Haruno Sakura…_**the name floated through his head like a melody. He did his best to stay calm. He had to sound smooth. "N-nice to meet you too, Sakura." **_Don't stutter! Don't stutter! You're doing good!_** "So…come here often?" He mentally slapped himself.

If Sakura noticed the lame pick up line, however, she didn't show it. "Actually, yeah. I attend classes up the hill."

Obviously, some kind of God was on his side today. "Classes? You're in college, 'tebayo?"

She made no mention of his strange grammar slips. "Yep. I'm hoping to become a nurse. It'll take a few years, though." She chuckled nervously.

**_So cute!_** Without thinking, Naruto found himself blurting out, "I work at a ramen stand!"

An awkward quiet seemed to fall between the two of them. Naruto was panicking. Why had he said that?! There was no logical need for it! She must think he was too stupid for school-or just lazy! Frantically, he tried to find a way to amend the situation. "Uh, but I-I mean, I graduated high school! I-no, I mean, I…I like…ramen…" By this point, his face felt as hot as a five-alarm fire. What on Earth was wrong with him?!

Sakura let out a soft sigh. This poor guy was _way_ too tense and self-conscious. At this rate, he may very well start hyperventilating and collapse. Not good. Time to diffuse the situation. "Really? Well, I like ramen! Where do you work?"

It was as if the sky had parted above him, with the sun beaming down, twittering birds and singing angels. This was it! The final stretch! For all his mistakes, she was still interested! A wave of relief washed over him. Putting on his most charming smile, he prepared to take the plunge. "It's near the Konoha suburbs. If you'd like…" he gulped, and continued on, "…we could exchange numbers, and maybe…eat lunch there sometime? I can get us a discount."

Naruto's heart was pounding like a jackhammer. It threatened to explode out from his chest. He watched the expression on Sakura's face. She appeared to be…interested! Thinking it over! She parted her lips, preparing to speak. He leaned closer, hoping not to screech in pure joy, once her number was in his hands. "Well, actually Naruto"-

"_There_ you are, forehead! I thought I'd find you here!"

The shrill voice made Naruto jump, as he stared off in slack-jawed horror, behind a now flustered Sakura. A third person was joining them-whether he liked it or not. And he didn't. At all.

"I-Ino! I told you not to call me that in public!" The pinkette was blushing profusely, as the new figure sauntered up to her. She had long, platinum blonde locks, pulled up in a high ponytail. Chin-length bangs swooped over the right side of her forehead, giving shadows to her ice blue eyes. They were much lighter than his. Her skin had a slight tan, and her legs were like a model's. She wasn't bad looking at all-but she was intruding on his perfect moment!

"But it's the only way to get your attention, love!" The blonde giggled, throwing her arms around the girl. "Don't you miss me?"

Sakura let out a deep sigh, as if defeated. "Naruto, this is Yamanaka Ino." She cast a sympathetic look in his direction. Ino peered over from Sakura's shoulders, pale eyes raking over the quietly fuming male.

"Oh, so _this_ is who's been holding you up!" She shot him a cocky grin. "Nice to meetcha!" And just as Naruto was about to shoot her an absolutely withering glare, he remembered.

In all his books that he'd slaved over, trying to perfect his technique to win the girl of his dreams, they'd always made mention…of the best friend. How important their opinions were. How they could easily make or break a budding relationship. How could he have forgotten?

He scoffed at himself mentally. Looks like he had one more obstacle to overcome, before Sakura could be officially called his. Once again, he put on a nice smile. "It's nice to meet you, too."

"Naruto was just telling me about the restaurant he works at." Sakura's energy seemed to have returned, as she was now chatting animatedly to the still tightly clutching Ino. "It's a ramen joint. He mentioned getting a discount."

"Really?" Ino's eyes were sparkling. "That'd be fun. I haven't had good ramen in a _long_ time." She looked at him. "Where is it?"

Although Naruto wished more than anything at that moment, that this bouncy pest would just disappear, he knew that he had to be courteous-lest he sabotage his chances with Sakura altogether. He steeled himself, as he repeated the info. "Near the Konoha suburbs." Ino nodded, apparently pleased with the location. This made him confident. "I can get an employee's discount for both of you, dattebayo. You're obviously very close friends."

Ino burst out laughing. Sakura shook her head. "That's not nice, Ino-pig." Looks like she had a nickname for her companion, as well. But nonetheless, Naruto was confused. "Did I…say something funny, 'tebayo?" She wasn't laughing at him for his grammar, was she? He hoped not.

Ino was trying to calm down. She seemed to have pulled Sakura closer. "No, no, I just-oh my_ God!_ Is he dense?! Or did you not tell him?"

Before he could react to the insult, a brightly blushing Sakura stepped in. "W-well, no…I thought it would be pretty easy to figure out, what with all the buttons and such…"

Naruto was still drawing a blank. **_Buttons?_**

"Oh, Saku!" Ino giggled again. "You know people don't really _read_ those things!" She looked at Naruto, with a strangely seductive expression on her face.

"I'm not just her 'best friend'-I'm her _girlfriend_!" And in one quick motion, she had captured the pinkette's lips in a tender kiss.

Naruto was in utter shock. All the color had drained from his face, as he struggled to find something else-anything else-to focus on, away from the couple before him. His eyes landed on Sakura's red purse, the right side fully exposed. His jaw felt like it was ready to drop off.

'Straight? So is spaghetti 'til you heat it up!'

'Tell me again why I need a boyfriend?'

'I kiss girls'

'Sorry boys, I like girls'

'4 out of 5 cats prefer lesbians'

**_Buttons…_**Naruto did his best to collect himself, as the two girls finally pulled apart from their liplock. Sakura gave him an apologetic smile. "Sorry, Naruto…but, are we still welcome to visit your restaurant?"

He had reached out to find something to hold onto, and his fingers had wrapped around the back of a nearby chair. It was the one across the table Sakura had been seated at. Pulling it out, he sat down and slumped over. He couldn't help it.

"Y-yeah, restaurant…discount, all of it, you're welcome…" His skin was still milk white.

"Alrighty then!" Ino pumped her fist in the air. "Let's go, Sakura! Or have you forgotten about your afternoon classes?"

The pinkette gasped. "Oh, crud! I'm gonna be late!" Ino scooped up her textbook, and Sakura gave Naruto a final smile. "Bye, Naruto! Hope to see you around!" Ino gave a short wave. He watched as the two girls scurried off towards the elevator, Ino squeezing her lover's side, and Sakura playfully swatting her hand.

Oh, well. So, his chance at love hadn't panned out like he wanted it to. He couldn't really stay upset. After all…they were both cute. And happy together. Who was he to force them apart? Pressing his chin into the refreshingly cool plastic tabletop, he let out a long breath.

"Next time, though…I've _gotta_ be on the lookout for those buttons, dattebayo!"

**A/N:** **Hey there, everybody. Hope you liked my little oneshot. The first entry on my second/spare account. It's just an idea that was floating through my head for the last few weeks. So, I finally decided to write it out. Inspired by my own personal experience (the buttons exist-I wear them on my own purse, though they don't seem to do much), as well as my love of the InoxSaku/SakuxIno pairing. And who hasn't felt the familiar feeling of nerves, when a certain someone catches their eye? Hopefully, Naruto will have better luck next time.**

**Ja-ne. =^.^=**


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